I’ve never been good at accepting compliments. In fact, I’ve even gone as far as experiencing imposter syndrome, believing that my “goodness” was just all a ruse, that I was really a bad person underneath it all, which honestly and quite sadly, is not at all uncommon for young women like myself.
Day 10: Something about which people seem to compliment you.
I hated feeling proud of myself and my accomplishments, it was buried deep under all my insecurities and beliefs of who I believed I “really” was. I used to think it made me vain and superior to others by accepting compliments. Though it’s gotten better, at times I wonder if it’s these people are describing or just a version of me they wish to see.
As a teenager I was obsessed about my looks, about whether my outfit was too loud, too quiet, whether it was trendy or last season. And of course, whenever I was complimented on my appearance my stomach flipped, I felt like I was finally doing something right. This was even more so if I was complimented by someone of the opposite gender.
Over time I realised a compliment on looks was nice, but also not the greatest, I didn’t feel anywhere near as excited as I used to, perhaps it was because I wanted to be noticed for my personality, my stories, my experiences, my dreams and desires. Physical appearances in comparison to being complimented on personality seemed so superficial.
Now that I’ve become more accepting of myself and in turn of actually coming to believe I am the person that people perceive me to be, I receive compliments on my ambition, my drive and determination in my work and my side hustles.
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