A Shift in Perspective & Where Have I Been?!?!

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This post was made more than 16 days ago and it hasn’t hit me until now. 

I had so many poetic beginnings for this post, they all worked, they all stated what I needed them to state but with flowery, flowery doesn’t work, it’s not entirely real or consistent with day-to-day life. So I came up with another, In my fresh, new notebook I turned the page. 

This somewhat symbolic representation of turning a new leaf had a profound effect on me, there were many things I realised about myself that I didn’t know until this very moment, and many things about life I suddenly became aware of. I can’t say I have grown in wisdom but as far as my own personal mistakes are concerned I’ve grown to correct them, to understand them, to know how to deal with them. 

A shift in perspective has come to me in various forms, through my counsellor, through reading and most of all, through my own personal reflections, and for that, I’m hugely grateful. I feel certain changes stirring inside me, changes in my personality and hopefully in the long-term changes to my overall mental well-being. Of course, I have my bad days, days where I need to feel the various emotions, to take time out for myself and learn to not push forward when I’m unable to, just to prove a point.

I say this not to state that my journey has finished or that I’ve achieved the exact emotions and the exact state of well-being that I’m absolutely satisfied with, but as a reminder to myself and to others that this journey is lifelong. Despite this being slightly off-putting, having a lifelong journey gives you time to improve, to learn, to grow and to correct any mistakes. In a way it gives me a sense of relief, it reminds me that I’m not a machine, I can change when I want, however I want to and it reminds me that I can, I don’t have to stay a certain way my entire life. Life itself and its experiences will inevitably change me, and finally, I’ve learnt to be okay with that.

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As for where I’ve been, now that’s probably a typical story, I ended up disappearing for much longer than I’d expected to but then again, what else can be expected from a full-time university student who is very close to exam season (and should be putting her head down and studying).

Despite being extremely busy, I don’t want to publish content just for the sake of having a blog post up 3-4 times a week, so I’d rather take my time and upload perhaps once to twice a week but with good quality content and graphics. For more my avid readers I do hope you understand this, by next year I’ll definitely have more of a hold over my blogging schedule and will have fresh new content to put out!! 


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